Pup or No Pup?

I had about 10 good reasons to hold off on getting a puppy. Among them, our 17.5 year old bichon-poo, Sophie who gets irritated easily (understandable when you're about 87 years old), and the relative calm in our lives due to the empty nest (our youngest child is a sophomore in college).

I had only one good reason to get a puppy. 

I fell in love and my heart tugged and pulled me toward him. 

I'd been watching my friend, Emily's

 "doodlecam" http://www.ustream.tv/channel/Doodlecam (a puppy cam trained on her litter of golden-doodles) practically from the time she sent an email announcing the birth of Sophie's  puppies just before Thanksgiving.  When they were 3 weeks old and had

 opened their little brown eyes for the first time, I could no longer stand just watching this puppy "reality show". I called her and begged to come see them.  When I arrived at her house an hour later, it was already nearing dusk.

We spent a couple hours cuddling puppies, one after the other. We sat side by side on her couch next to the whelping box. 

Em suggested I climb into the whelping box, and pose with the pups. As I picked up two of the pups and held them, she took my picture.  

Happiness is a 3 week old puppy snuzzling in the crook of your neck. 

The hours evaporated and by the time I looked at my watch, it was dark and I needed to head home and make dinner.

I emailed the breeder, Kathryn to let her know I was interested in adopting one of the puppies. 

I must've changed my mind about twenty times during the course of the next five weeks.

 I wrote the pros and cons. I ended daily journal entries with, "Puppy or No Puppy?".

I chased after the postal carrier to send in the deposit only to regret it a week later. What if my  Sophie's health suddenly deteriorated? (her hips were already showing signs of weakening). What if he antagonized her or injured her thinking she was a puppy?

 I told Em and the breeder that I just couldn't do it-  Maybe one day after Sophie was no longer with us...

Then, about 5 days before the pups were to go to their new homes, Em posted portraits of each of the dogs. And there he was. They called him "Kelly" because he wore a kelly green ribbon so they could tell him apart from the others.

Now if you saw this face, what would you do?  Right. You'd fall head over heels in love. 

I called the breeder and begged her to put my deposit towards a dog, this dog, Kelly Green. It was a relief to finally make the decision for better or worse.